Monday, December 27, 2010

LONG NIGHT’S JOURNEY

Scrooge eventually returned to gratitude and so have I, despite my lapse into negativity for a couple weeks. Winter solstice marks the long night’s journey into day. I have a lot to be grateful for but sometimes I hit a low spot. Cold snowy weather and cloudy days are not positive for me. My Seasonal Affective Disorder is strong this year. I have a full spectrum light that I turn on at night from 7-8pm (I don’t like to use it in the morning). I take St. John’s Wort and that usually is enough. I feel a bit isolated being unemployed for six months. Extra stress of unemployment may indicate that I need a prescription for a mild anti-depressant instead of taking the herbal supplement.

I attended an Al-Anon meeting for a second time and it was most helpful. The first week was very crowded but this time there were fewer people due to the holiday and it was easier to chat. I am still reading the pamphlets and need to check out a couple books from the library. The AA-style format is a good method of developing a social network. I don’t agree with defining God-Creator as a male (it either has no gender, is all genders-intrasex, doesn’t recognize gender, or doesn’t exist). Humans are too flawed to know.

Reducing stress through physical labor is helpful. I was just going to sweep the basement in anticipation of Tillie being allowed downstairs (she has been sequestered to first floor due to her naughty nature). She is eight months now and learning not to be such a profound pest, plus, her kitten food is almost done so I think its okay for her to consume adult cat food. Anyway, I decided to organize the clutter (recycling or throwing out a lot).

Removing old drywall is exhausting. Some fool (previous owner) placed it with the bottom to the floor and mold has grown since water sometimes seeps in after a heavy summertime rain. I had to spray it down with horrid bleach (turned on the clothes dryer with no heat to help suck out the toxic stench) before removing the first batch. I still have a large section to pound out but I am certain that it will reduce sneezing this summer. Add on frequent snow hefting and scraping snow off the roof and I am tired.

Good riddance 2010!
© 2010

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