My heart has been shattered myriad times. First, there was Ted who dumped me to go backpacking with his former girlfriend through Europe. Second, was Mitch. I was falling for him, we became intimate and then he broke it off. I later learned that he was already engaged to someone and I was the “other woman.” What a slime-ball. If he cheated while they were dating, he will cheat while they are married. It still hurt to be discarded. Mitch also boasted about being friends with all his former lovers. I think its good to be cordial with an ex, essential when kids are involved, and great to be friendly. Friendship is a bit too far. I would always worry that Mitch would want to get back with the ex. Been there, done that with Ted.
Third archer was Donel. We worked together and it was probably foolish of me to hook up with someone I’d see on the job. Chemistry overwhelmed me as our flirtations became intimate. He said that his former girlfriend was gone forever. Of course, his ex Cherlyn moved back to Minnesota and he started to act oddly. We never officially broke up but I heard through the grapevine that they had reunited. Cherlyn started working at the restaurant and threatened me with a knife when we were alone. She said that they had never broken up and that I had seduced Donel, which was not true. I softly told her that he had lied to both of us and couldn’t be trusted. They both quit their jobs and began to stalk me. Cherlyn was very aggressive and I was concerned that she would hurt me. I had to move, place a privacy hold on my driver’s license and car registration, and change my phone number to unlisted. Thankfully, they didn’t harass me at my new apartment but it was rather frightening.
I’ve dated lots of other men and broke up with a few on my own. JT was a smart, funny, and jealous. He got all worked up about my gay friends. He could not imagine that a male-female relationship could be platonic. I know that jealously is based in fear and lack of trust. I should have urged couples counseling but ended our relationship instead. I’ve already written about some of the men I “hung out” with and never kissed. Not sure why we didn’t became physical. The mental attraction was there but we were too shy or just lacked the chemistry. Women have also asked me out and I’ve politely turned them down. No chemistry.
No more poison, please.
© 2013 Ima B. Musing