The past several years have been an extremely difficult period in my life. My terrible journey was published on March 12th. As you know, I deal with low-grade anxiety every day. The anxiety makes me fret. Worry interrupts my concentration, causes nervous eating, insomnia, and low self-esteem. The worst-case scenario leads to panic attack, nausea, and irritable bowel syndrome, yuck.
I have learned how to keep most of the symptoms of anxiety at bay by employing organization to reduce stress. Accomplishing a task or two each day improves my mood. I like to be occupied but not too busy. I need some quiet time to recharge myself. I can become overwhelmed by too much of anything such as noise, smells, vibrations, or visual stimulation. Bright sunshine or intense lights can cause me discomfort. Despite having a high IQ (which is situational), I fall slightly into the autistic spectrum with a touch of Aspburgers just to make life interesting.
During that horrible week I was besieged by all my problems. My anxiety peaked along with physical pain from the auto accident. The combination sent me spinning towards depression. Depression plus anxiety is pure hell. You feel anxious about being miserable and too down in the dumps to reduce the angst that causes the blues. It’s a horrid situation. Thankfully, I realized it after I wrote the blog entry and was able to pull myself away from the pit of despair.
I am feeling much better now. No, my challenges have not vanished but I refuse to permit them to vex me. The only thing that I can control is my reaction. I choose not to fall into that sink-hole again. Each day is a battle but I shall survive. I sought out friends to share my woes. They offered sympathy and well wishes. I have to concentrate on the people who do like me and forget about those who are ambivalent or negative (my family).
If you are ever feeling sad or negative, seek help. You deserve to be happy and positive. I met with a kind counselor on a regular basis and developed methods to cope with the emotional roller coaster of life. There are many free or low cost mental health resources available, just research them in your community. Find an experienced, licensed, and professional therapist and explore behavioral methods to thwart the agony. Don’t worry; be happy or at least neutral.
Zozo’s breathing is still a concern. I'll write more about that at another time.
Keep on Truckin’.
© 2013 Ima B. Musing
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